2021 Tarkovsky Prize Runner Up: Marvin Chen
Separated By Thousands of Miles in THE FAREWELL
by Marvin Chen
Lulu Wang’s The Farewell is a poignant depiction of a universal human experience –– the loss of a loved one. However, as a first-generation Chinese American, I recognize the unique take Wang was trying to convey from the start: the family dynamics and seemingly having a foot in two worlds. The film explores the story of Billi, a Chinese American writer from New York, and her Nai Nai (paternal grandmother) who is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. The family chooses to conceal the diagnosis from Nai Nai and calls for a farewell masked as a wedding, a ruse that Billi fundamentally disagrees with and struggles to maintain. As the family turned actors reunite in Changchun, China, different attitudes toward death and dueling personalities set up the backdrop for a comedy that ultimately has somber undertones. “Based on an actual lie” (as marketed), The Farewell highlights the dichotomy between Western and Eastern culture; a separation within a cross-cultural family that stretches thousands of miles and spans cultures, generations and distance, all framed in the context of a riveting visual story that uses dialogue, symbolism and imagery to a masterful effect.
Wang’s juxtaposition of Western and Eastern culture through family dialogues emphasizes the cultural barriers that exist within a cross-cultural family. The conversation at the family dinner was all too familiar, with the uncles and aunts and cousins you haven’t seen in ages seated at a round table, though the topic is centered more on academic performance for me personally. In Billi’s case, her family compares job opportunities between the United States and China. In a Chinese household, material wealth is an indicator of success, yet American values accentuate self accomplishments. A few testy exchanges prompt Billi to conclude the conversation by emphasizing how America is just different from China, not necessarily better. The dialogue used was authentic, spoken in fluent Mandarin and with cultural fluency. Even the subtitles, dare I say it, were proficient.
Billi’s usage of Mandarin and English added to the authenticity as Billi has a noticeable accent and needs her parents to translate certain phrases, a characterization that befits a Chinese American who has not had to use Mandarin in her daily life. Since the main character is Billi, her representation in the film through her dialogue is a living embodiment of the cultural barriers that exist between East and West. In the hospital scene, while dealing with her grandmother’s incessant matchmaking, Billi speaks in English to communicate with the doctor so Nai Nai does not understand the severity of her sickness. The doctor’s rationale that this may extend the longevity of someone diagnosed with a terminal illness because it keeps them in a positive mood baffles Billi, somebody who was raised in the West and thinks her grandmother deserves the truth.
In the hotel smoking scene, Billi, along with her father and uncle, discuss the ethics behind the decision to continue with “the good lie”. Both her father and uncle say in a determined tone that it is better for Nai Nai to live without worries, as she should leave the worries to the younger generations. Her uncle offers some clear insight: “You think one’s life belongs to oneself. But that’s the difference between the East and the West. In the East, a person's life is part of a whole. Family. Society ... We’re not telling Nai Nai because it’s our duty to carry this emotional burden for her.” The lines were delivered powerfully, leaving Billi speechless. The silence or lack of dialogue makes the message even more potent. This stark contrast between collectivism and individualism is perhaps the strongest cultural difference between the East and the West; the whole film is predicated on not letting Nai Nai confront her mortality alone. Through authentic and engaging dialogue, Wang crafts a highly recognizable story of somebody who exists within two cultures and the conflict accompanying it, something that I personally relate to.
Symbolism is used in the film to establish connections between characters and their emotions that are given form in the physical realm. There is a dark-colored bird that appears at the beginning in New York and reappears at the very end in Changchun. The bird personifies the connection Billi has with her family in China, particularly Nai Nai. The strength of that bond is evident as the film starts with Billi speaking with Nai Nai, and it is fitting Billi grunts just like her grandmother taught her, causing the same type of birds to take off near Nai Nai’s home, an entire continent away. You get the sense that no matter what happens, Billi’s love for her grandmother remains strong and vice versa. Another symbolic scene is when Billi plays the piano in China. At first, the musical piece appears to embellish the atmosphere of the family gathering, showing Billi’s restraint and grasp over her emotions. However, from the facial expressions and the intensity of her finger smashing that soon follows, it instead shows how frustrated she is. The cacophony of her music is a symbol of the anger and guilt that plagues her for agreeing to lie; even after traveling great distances, she cannot tell Nai Nai the secret. The symbols in the film allow the audience to gauge each character’s mood and make it more relatable to viewers who may not be familiar with the culture, a technique that enhances the universal appeal of the story.
Wang’s use of strong imagery is what makes the film memorable and there are some notable uses that illustrate a generational gap for different purposes. When the family goes to pay respect to their grandfather, everyone contributes some effort in placing foods such as bread, cookies, and fruits. Through the cemetery setting and bright colors of the cinematography, the audience can immerse themselves into the scene and feel the liveliness, allowing viewers a window into a possibly unfamiliar culture. The generational divide is apparent when Billi’s father “offers” a cigarette to his father by burning it (The Chinese believed burning material goods allows them to send the object to the deceased), much to the chastity of his mother, Nai Nai. Funny gaffes like this exist through the film, and paired with the unique shots and decor, the film’s genre as a comedy is reflected well. A more serious example is when Billi and her mom were looking for Aiko’s earring and had a discussion over their family’s decision to move to America long ago. As Billi starts to get emotional and reminisce about her childhood in China, her mother sits on the couch and lectures her over dwelling on the past. Despite them being at a “happy” wedding, pink and white balloons draped in the background, it is a feeling of sadness and bitterness between mother and daughter as they prepare for the wedding and the final day of deceiving Nai Nai. The imagery thus serves as the ultimate tool to set the mood according to the plot, where even cemetery scenes can be light-hearted gaffes and balloons with a wedding create a gloomy atmosphere.
As a Chinese American with family members still residing in China, I empathize with many scenes in this film because of my similar experiences. Separated by thousands of miles is a physical barrier, a generational barrier, a cultural barrier. But it can be overcome. The film has the power to evoke strong feelings and reminds me that crying and sadness are just as contagious as laughter and happiness. The farewell scene calls to me the most. I was in the exact position as Billi, sitting in the back seat of the car headed to the airport and watching my grandparents wave goodbye as their figures gradually became smaller and smaller. The camerawork for this particular scene is remarkable, following the point of view through the eyes of Billi and letting the viewer see through her from the rear window. The score for the scene is “Come Healing”, a fitting song that expresses the love Billi has for Nai Nai. Wang does an incredible job showing the implications of this farewell: it may very well be the last time Billi sees Nai Nai. It is a sobering part of life that anyone could relate to and is a testament to the appeal of Wang’s story. But just like Billi, I would ultimately choose not to tell. I might play along with any lies, just to see my grandparents smiling. I take solace in the fact that farewell in Chinese means see you again.